What follows is a listing of the many and varied faces abuse takes on in our present day society. Before looking at this list we need to keep two things in mind along the way. ONE, what did abuse look like to us as a child and how has it continued to look as adults? As we recover we need to uncover, tell the family secrets so to speak, and identify in what ways abuse came to us. It is amazing how we adapt to the abnormal and then fail to understand other than to know in our gut things are just not right.

Then TWO, the real tough part is to name how we have been abusive to those in our families and communities. This is where Steps 4, 5 and 6 come in as we do our inventory, tell another trusted human being and God and become willing to make amends where to do so will not harm others. A reminder here though, this is not a BLAME GAME, it IS a NAME GAME. We can and should feel healthy guilt over our past unhealthy deeds but as we step on each one, we put them to rest and move on with our lives, forgiving those that have hurt us and forgiving ourselves for hurting others.